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RaceFansTV and a thank you to Mark Webber

May 3, 2010 Leave a comment

I received an email today containing a link to a very interesting website that I feel is worth mentioning to anyone who happens to stumble upon this blog, which is suprisingly more than I honestly expected lately due to a slight increase in traffic. The funny thing about the increase is that I have Mark Webber’s funny faces to thank! Yes, according to the search engine terms in my blog’s dashboard, most people who end up here without my help (meaning those who didn’t click my various forum signatures and such) did so by looking for funny pictures of Mark Webber. Thanks Mark!

Anyway, the link I received this morning is for a new site called RaceFansTV. No spaces in the name it seems, which I think makes it easier to remember the url as well, which is simply RaceFansTV.com. You can’t forget that, surely.

To give you an idea of what to expect from the site, I will quote RaceFansTV.

RaceFansTV is an international initiative led by motorsports enthusiasts to bring back much of the great historical racing footage that has been captured over the past 80 years – since the video camera was invented.

Because motorsports is a global industry, we have team members working from 4 continents and collaborators sharing content and helping us manage the system from at least 15 different countries.

So while an ¨About Us¨ section might be particularly interesting on some websites; here, there is nothing special. We are like you, passionate about motorsport and highly motivated to keep all the classes of racing alive for future generations. Therefore, we hope you will join us and this section can be about you too!

Good honest people with a very ambitious and exciting sounding website! They have a very innovative site, so check it out.

RaceFansTV – http://www.racefanstv.com/

Tomorrow I’ll write up an information piece about F1 2010 on the PC, Playstation 3, and Xbox 360. In a few more months we’ll have our hands on it, so I figure it’s time to start storing information on this destined-to-be-good Codemasters racing game.

Files from the Flash Drive: Murrayisms

April 26, 2010 Leave a comment

While browsing my flash drive, which I do quite often, I found a text document containing a collection of Murrayisms.

For those who do not know, a “Murrayism” is an amusing (and usually factual incorrect) quip made by former BBC and ITV F1 commentator Murray Walker. He was a legend of a commentator, having been the voice of Formula One for many years. Whether you love him or hate him, you can’t forget him.

Here are the Murrayisms that I’ve been storing.

(Adelaide 1986, Mansell’s tire blow-out) “[Rosberg] may have been prepared to move over… (tire explodes) AAAAAND LOOK AT THAT!!!! Out, and… and collossaly… that’s Mansell!!! THAT IS NIGEL MANSELL!!!! And the car absolutely shattered… he’s fighting for control… you can see what happened… that’s Mansell out of the race. Now, this could change and will change the world championship.”

“Anything can happen in Formula 1, and it usually does.”
A catchphrase which he frequently used.

“The car in front is absolutely unique – except for the one behind it, which is identical.”

“He’s obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can’t see it.”

“With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go”

“Jenson (Button) will win, when the car is good enough for his talent.” – free practice, Silverstone 2006

“Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna’s Lotus sounding rough?”

“Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place.”

“[Mansell’s] gone from seventh to sixth, from fourth to fifth and now to third…”

“As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is 5th.”

“I can’t imagine what kind of problem Senna has. I imagine it must be some sort of grip problem.”

“He is shedding buckets of adrenaline in that car.”

“It’s raining and the track is wet.”

“And there’s just a few more corners for Nigel Mansell to go to win the Canadian Grand Prix…and…he’s going rather slow….HE’S STOPPING! HE’S STOPPING!” – on the last lap of the 1991 Canadian Grand Prix

“And this is the third placed car about to lap the second placed car…”

Murray: “That’s Ralf Schumacher, you can see the cooling elements from his balaclava helmet sticking out over his forehead.” (he keeps talking then realises…) “They’re not the cooling elements – ” (laughing) “that’s his hair!”
Martin Brundle is bemused: “I can’t think of a one-liner to come back in there, Murray!”
Murray: “Neither can I, except ‘What am I saying?!'”
(Malaysian Grand Prix 2001)

“They say clothes maketh the man… the clothes are Niki Lauda’s, but the contents are me…”
Said when preparing to take a drive in a F1 car. Walker subsequently stalled the engine. (Apparently, this was the second attempt to film Murray in an F1 McLaren – the first, earlier that day, had gone very well, but for technical reasons couldn’t be used as the onboard camera was not fixed when he thought another signal was the signal to go, almost obliterating a cameraman. When he came in after the end of his successful run, he drove for seven laps after the in-board was displayed!)

“…Senna knows exactly where Mansell is because he can him in his earphones…”
Attempting to describe how the leader can see the driver following him in his mirrors.

“So Bernie [Ecclestone], it’s some seventeen years since you bought McLaren, you’ve had some good times, you’ve had some bad times. What do you remember best ?”
Ecclestone responded “Well I don’t remember buying McLaren.”
Murray turns to the camera “I’ve done it again!”

“What’s that? There’s a BODY on the track!!!”
James Hunt responded “Um, I think that that is a piece of BODY-WORK, from someone’s car.”

“There’s a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari”
James Hunt responded “No, Murray, that’s his rear safety light”.

Murray: And look at the flames coming from the back of Berger’s McLaren.
James: Actually, Murray, they’re not flames, it’s the safety light.

“Nigel (Mansell), first of all, would you slowly and carefully take your hat off? You’ve got an enormous bump on your head, can I show it to them (the viewers)?” [Nigel leans forward to show the camera] “Right up there?” [Murray accidentally pokes the bump with his finger] “Ooh… I’m sorry…” [A pained Nigel laughs it off]
During a post race interview with Mansell after the Austrian GP in 1987.

From the Spanish GP 1995: “and Eddie Jordan is in fifth place”… (actually Eddie Irvine in one of his compatriot Eddie Jordan’s cars).
“…and he’s lost both right front tyres” (which may have been accurate back in the days of the Tyrrell P34, but it was from 1995!)

“…Cruel luck for Alesi, second on the grid. That’s the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year…”

James: “And now what’s wrong with Prost’s car?”
Murray: “It’s not Prost’s car it’s that joker in the striped shirt!”

“Ah! Now here’s Senna in the pits (for the black flag). No point in saying I wish I could lip read: I can’t even see his lips! There’s Ron Dennis bending over at the right. This is A-! Out gets Senna! For whatever reason and I just hope we can get a message about this. I hope we can get a message. Ayrton Senna with, with rage and impotent fury etched in every line of his body, reluctantly drags himself out of the McLaren.” (In reality Senna calmly stepped out of the car and walked away.)

“Well let’s, uh, lugsh, luxurrriate in a little hypothesis and try to work out what, if anything, is wrong with Alain Prost.” (Prost was being caught by Berger late in the race.) “Has he got tire problems? Very unlikely. Is Prost having fuel trouble? Well, who knows? I think it’s a bit unlikely. Is Prost having gearbox trouble? I can’t tell you. And since P, uh, Prost is unlikely to come on the radio and let me know you’ll have to guess along with me.”

“ANNDD! We have a, uh, I – (laughing) – I, uh, I’m S- (still laughing). I have to eat humble pie again, for all the people out there. Uh, we have a lap scoring problem and, uh, I have to rather lamely tell you that, uh, it’s still Gerhard Berger in 2nd place. It’s Berger in 3rd position. In four- in- in-. Um, Boutsen in 3rd position…”

“That’s 55 laps completed by both Prost and Berger and and and and and the expeeerrrienced Alain Prost is really responding.”

“And there’s the man in the green flag!”

“The Jordan factory is at the factory gates”

“…and there’s no damage to the car…..except to the car itself.”

“The beak of Ayrton Senna’s chicken is pulling ahead”

“David pulls across in front of Coulthard…” (actually Mika Hakkinen at the start of the 1998 Australian GP)

“and I interrupt myself to bring you this….”

“Unless I’m very much mistaken… and YES I AM very much mistaken!”

“This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well.”

“Two laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the action, which it is.”

“This has been a great season for Nelson Piquet, as he is now known, and always has been”

“And the first five places are filled by five different cars.” (Teams of course)

“…the lead is now 6.9 seconds. In fact it’s just under 7 seconds”

“Tambay’s hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now.”

“You can’t see a digital clock because there isn’t one.”

“…and Blundell is doing very well in sixth position…in fact he’s lapping 2.5 seconds faster than Blundell who is in fifth position”

“We’re watching the Finnish Driver who is third, but he won’t for very much llllong…oh yeah, he might be actually”

“And an enormous gap building before Mika Hakkinen goes through in third position…when I say enormous it’s 1.5 seconds”

“Schumacher is still the fastest man on the track, not only by virtue of the fact that he leads the Australian Grand Prix, but he also holds the fastest lap”

“Eddie Irvine with smoke pouring up from the eng…I suspect something’s locked up and he’s out of the race”

“And Alesi spins there…spins out of the race, surely… “Yes!…NO! Alesi manages to keep the engine, does not stall, but of course he will have lost the place I think. No! he’s kept the place”

“Yes, the beauty of this race is that it is totally unpredictable”

“Michael Schumacher leading Damon Hill by four tenths of a second or so, because it’s moving…[image cuts from Mansell to Hill under Schu’s rear wing] AND THAT’S NOT FOUR TENTHS OF A SECOND! That’s Michael Schumacher!”

“The Italian GP at Monaco…”

“I’m applying intelligence and observation to the situation…”

“Schumacher’s appeal for ignoring the chequered flag is next Tuesday.”

“…the enthusiastic enthusiasts…” (Italy 1994)

“Martin’s got a bald spot – he won’t be pleased…” (Germany, 1994, as Brundle retires, and climbs out of the car. Murray stops talking about the broken McLaren as soon as he sees Martin’s head)

“…and Andretti is going very slowly – he must have an electrical problem of some sort… “(Andretti is touring on three wheels, having hit something solid)

“…but Here is Now and There is Damon Hill”

“So now you’re looking at the battle between Frentzen and Herbert for 7th place. Heinz Harald Frentzen in the Sauber Mercedes behind Johnny Herbert, behind him Johnny Herbert in his first race in the Ligier Renault…”

“Ukyo Katayama is undoubtedly the best Formula 1 driver that grand prix racing has ever produced’

“…and the Peugeot cup of misery is filled past overflowing…”

Murray: “And there are flames coming from the back of Prost’s car as he enters the swimming pool.”
James: “Well, that should put them out then.”

“Alesi is in second place and Hill is in second place…”

“As you can see, visually, with your eyes…”

“Andrea de Cesaris…the man who has won more Grands Prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them.”

“And why would they want a bigger rear wing? Because a bigger rear wing means more downforce, more downforce means more grip, more grip means more transmission…”

“Well done Ukyo, well done Ukyo, you are a Japanese gentleman!” [as Katayama got out of the way for Schumacher and Villeneuve, Jerez 1997]

“Oh that’s the Forti, and, it looks like, err, its Roberto Moreno’s car , the err Brazilian .. I was going to say the elderly Brazilian , he’s only 36 but he’s actually the oldest driver in the race at the present moment, though he’s just retired from it!”

“Hill, Hill … Hill is in, he’s beneath me now… and he’s got slicks! It’s slicks! He got a new set of slicks! This is strange” (as it was raining!)

“….Schumacher crosses the line to start another lap, and there’s nothing there!”

“The Benetton handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very very ####### this car at the beginning of the season.”

“And we have had 5 races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco!”

“And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it’s Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit, and Damon Hill in the pit, no it’s Michael Schumacher!”

“…and now, just in case there is any CONFUSION (operative term here) this is the race order on lap 19: David Coulthard leads and has yet to stop; Hakkinen leads and has yet to stop…”

“A Mars a day helps you work, rest and play” [The long-standing rumour that Murray actually wrote this legendary slogan is completely false. He says himself that he “was responsible for the administration of what is probably one of the best known slogans of them all”, whatever that means…]

“Nigel Mansell – the man of the race – the man of the day – the man from the Isle of Man”

“An Achilles heel for the McLaren team this year, and it’s literally the heel because it’s the gearbox”

“And now the boot is on the other Schumacher”

“The atmosphere is so tense you could cut it with a cricket stump”

“Alain Prost is in a commanding second place”

“Now the Frenchman Jacques Lafitte is as close to Surer as Surer is to Lafitte.”

“I don’t make mistakes. I make prophecies which immediately turn out to be wrong” [Murray on his style of commentary]

“I am inclined to go over the top and I know it. I am communicating an electric situation”

“I like to think I come over as a slightly over-the-top enthusiast. It is a very exciting sport after all”

[after Derek Warwick spun at Monaco ending up facing the wrong way…] “Now he must not go the wrong way round the circuit, and unless he can spin himself stationary through 360 degrees I fail to see how he can avoid doing so.”

[possibly Murray’s most ecstatic moment when Mansell passed Senna to win in Hungary after starting well down the grid] “He’s going for it! OH MY GOODNESS…HE’S THROOOOOOUGH!!!”

“We’re now on the 73rd lap and the next one will be the 74th.” [Monaco 1992]

“James has just nipped out to have a look at the far side of the circuit” [Actually James Hunt would leave the commentary box to smoke a joint!]

“If they have any shillelaghs in Suzuka, they’ll be playing them tonight.” [after Eddie Irvine’s 6th place in his first grand prix]

“He’s watching us from hospital with his injured knee.”

“In his quieter moments he sounds like his trousers are on fire” [Clive James on Murray Walker]

“Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. Oh no he isn’t! It’s a lap record.”

“It’s not quite a curve, it’s a straight actually.”

“Victory at the 1999 Monaco Grand Prix goes to Ayrton Senna” [from the 1990 Monaco GP]

[hysterical as ever] “And that’s Alboreto OFF!” [long pause – somber voice] “Now Michele Alboreto did not in fact qualify for the race, so how we managed to see him go off I don’t know. We’ll let you know.” [Even longer pause, now laughing] “Now I’m not a technician, but it appears a shot of Michele Alboreto going off in qualifying has crept into this live transmission, thank you Mr. Producer, anyway that was qualifying, this is the race…”

[Alesi, then in a Tyrrell, was passed by Senna at Phoenix, or was he…] “And Senna’s going through on the inside, or is he, YES!, but now Alesi has the inside, side by side, Alesi! Wow! Great Stuff!”

“..and Damon Hill is following Damon Hill”

“Jean Alesi is 4th and 5th”

“Schumacher has made his final stop three times!”

“And he has been lapped 9th, 10th, 11th'” (This was in reference to Jacques Villeneuve, who was leading at the time, and there were only 11 cars running anyway!)

“Nigel Mansell had a problem with the wheel-nut on his Williams, then he went on to win brilliantly for Ferrari!”

Jacques Villeneuve is just making the last turn on the last lap. “I’m going to stick my neck out here and say that Jacques Villeneuve is going to keep the Ferrari of Michael Schumacher behind him and win his first GP…”

“And the car upside down is a Toyota” [During a BTCC race. At the time, Toyota were using the slogan “The car in front is a Toyota”; in this race, both works Toyotas took each other out…]

“It has all come alive in Hungary. There is the proof! Williams! Benetton! Ferrari! The Benetton is Berger and the Ferrari is Damon Hill!”

“And Damon Hill is going under the drier part of the Monaco circuit, that’s of course because it’s got a roof”

“Look at Michael Schumacher. He’s on the ragged edge between flying off the track and staying off it.”

“And that just shows you how important the car is in Formula One racing”

“I know it’s an old cliché, but you can cut the atmosphere with a cricket stump”

“And Olivier Panis justifiably wins such a well deserved Grand Prix” (in which Hill, Schumacher, Alesi, Berger and Villeneuve all came off and only 4 out of 20 drivers finished)

“People ask me who’s going to be the next Hill, the next Schumacher, and I keep saying to watch out for Mika Salo” (Salo crashes a few laps later)

(Schumacher is coming out the pit lane ahead of Villeneuve) “And Schumacher overtakes Villeneuve. Oh, no he doesn’t! Oh, yes he does!”

“Stop! Stop! Look! Look! It’s a Williams, and I’m guessing that’s Jacques Villeneuve, I can’t tell you for sure because I can’t see from here. And so Villeneuve retires …. it’s Hill! Damon Hill is out of the Monza Grand Prix!”

“They’re now on lap 68, which means there’s one, two, three, four, five laps to go before the end of the Hungarian Grand Prix” (hey, kids, learn to count with Murray…..)

“And he’s done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures”.

“Into lap 53, the penultimate last lap but one”

“Nigel Mansell is the last person in the race apart from the five in front of him.”

“Alboreto into the pits and I’m going to stop the startwatch…!”

“And Hill congratulates Schumacher. They’re not bosom buddies, but they’re not far off!” (Hill was actually critising Schumacher for heavy-handed driving tactics after the 1995 Belgian GP).

“There goes Panis in the Prost. For years we knew them as Ligiers, because that is what they were called.”

“And I usually say that if anything is going to go wrong with the car, it has done by now, but I’m not going to say that about Jacques Villeneuve…. Oh, I already have”. (Brazil 1997)

“And Michael Schumacher is in the pits!” (he was out by then, although he was probably in the garage or something.)

Murray: There’s a car coming into the pits now, they’re so unreliable with all those electronics on board.
James: Actually, Murray, one of his wheels has just fallen off!

“And this is Ralf Schumacher the youngest driver in F1 at only 21 years old, and of course he is the son of twice world champion Michael!” (PF: Any rumours that Mick Schumacher already has a GP2 drive are entirely false, of course! And Ralf is Michael’s younger brother, not son.)

Monza 96. Remember those stupid tyre stacks on the kerbs which got scattered around the track on the first lap? Camera cuts to single tyre in the middle of the track. Murray:” And look at that tyre! Someone had better go and get that quickly. (As if on cue, a marshall runs out and grabs it) WELL DONE LAD!!!!!”

“Heinz-Harald Frentzen. The man with all the luck, and it’s all bad.” (Qualifying Imola 97)

Murray: Eddie Irvine is in the pit lane.
Camera flashes to an empty Ferrari pit with mechanics milling about. Martin: “I think he … ahh … didn’t come in.” A little later when it was obvious (to Murray) that Eddie didn’t come in. “We all make mistakes, and I certainly made a whopper there.”

[Camera focused on a Williams in its pitstop] “Bitter hard luck for Nigel Mansell-” [Mansell’s Lotus flashes by in the pitlane] “There he is! That was Mansell leaving the pits, and so now… [Camera cuts to Mansell in his own pitstop] And there is Nigel Mansell in the pits…so I must have seen… Well I can hardly understand it… Oh, he must have been entering the pits, I apologise!”

Near the end. “He (Jackie Stewart) will not produce a winner, but if he can produce second, it will be the next best thing.”

“…and if you look back 4 seconds…no, 31 seconds…!” (Imola, 27th. April 1997)

“And Panis is almost literally laughing his head off in that car.”

“If I was Michael Schumacher…. which of course I am not…”

“And the track temperature has in fact risen in degrees!”

“Well he’s world champion, and we only get one of those a year.”

“And the first three cars are all Escorts, which isn’t surprising as this is an all Escort race”

“I should imagine that the conditions in the cockpit are unimaginable!”

“Well, that is amazing, but I fear, absolutely… predictable!”

“And as the race starts… I regret that we must leave Brands Hatch, join us again at 4.45!”

“Three lights… four lights… five laps… (laughs) pause! Go, Go, Go!”

“As an Englishman, I have my fingers crossed for Eddie Irvine in the Jaguar.” (Irvine comes from Northern Ireland)

“Michael Schumacher is scything his way through the field… (Schumacher crashes) OOHHHHH! Schumacher out of the race!” (Canada 1999)

“And this will be Williams’ first win, since last time a Williams won!”

“Jenson Button, in the top ten, is in eleventh position…”

(Jarno Trulli was on the screen, but just as Murray opened his mouth, it cut to his Jordan team-mate Heinz-Harald Frentzen)
Murray: Jarno Trulli… there’s a man who is yet to show his potential this year.
Martin: So that’s Trulli wearing Frentzen’s crash helmet, Murray?

“There are actually seven previous winners of the Monaco Grand Prix, starting in tomorrow’s race, and four of them are Michael Schumacher… there he is now!”

“Are they on a one-stopper, are they on a two-stopper? And when I say who… er, they… er.. who do I mean? Well, I don’t know…”

“‘Will it rain?’, said Jim Rosenthal. Well Murray Walker says ‘Yes it will’… but then maybe it won’t!”

“Now, if Alesi has run out of fuel – and I’m going to use an Anglo-Saxon expression here – the Benetton mechanics are looking AB-SO-LUTE-LY FUUUURRRIOUS!”

“Oh Jean. O-o-h Jean. You have got a MAJOR problem sunshine when you get back to the pits”

“Damon Hill, there he is, he in… er, leading the Belgian Grand Prix, for the first time in a Jordan! He’s leading the race, for the first time, since he led the Hungarian Grand Prix (of 1997) in an Arrows… apart from his earlier lead here, of course!” (It was actually the second time Damon had taken the lead after Michael Schumacher crashed out. You could just see that coming…)

“Now, for real spectacular driving… watch this!” (Car flips over)

“And now, excuse me while I interrupt myself.”

“It must be Barrichello, it must be Barrichello .. no no, it’s Schumacher!!! It’s Schumacher!!! Oh my goodness!!! Michael Schumacher is out of the German Grand Prix!!!”

(Adelaide 1991, race stopped in appalling conditions) “Oh… hello-hello? That’s Riccardo Patrese, going up to tell the officials what the time of day is!”

“And Damon Hill exits the chicane and wins the Japanese Grand Prix, and I’ve got to stop, because I’ve got a lump in my throat!”
As his good friend Damon Hill finally won the Driver’s Championship, Murray Walker could no longer contain his delight.

Monza 1992: “Mansell is 7.3 seconds ahead of Nigel Mansell and Berger is in 13th place…”

Monza 1988 (about the McLarens): “Smooth… and very reliable.” (Commentator’s Curse strikes half a lap afterwards, when Prost’s engine develops a problem)

Adelaide 1995 (as Coulthard pits): “And into the pitlane… (Coulthard understeers into the pitlane barrier) OOAAARRRGGGHHH! My goodness! David Coulthard smashes himself out of the Australian- I have never seen that before!”

Nurburgring 1995 (on Délétrazs antics): “And what is Délétraz doing? (pause) Doesn’t matter what he’s doing, it’s what Alesi and Schumacher are doing that matters.”

“But a brrrrrrilliant race for Michael Schumacher, who exits the chicane for the 53rd and last time, to win the 2000 Japanese Grand Prix and the World Championship, for the third time, to give Ferrari and Italy that dream and look! Look! He knows it!” As Schumacher wins the Japanese Grand Prix with title challenger Mika Hakkinen just two seconds behind.

To top it off, here is a YouTube video showcasing some of Murray’s best moments.

I have also made a page on this blog specifically for Murray’s quotes because yes, they are just that great.

Shifting Focus

April 23, 2010 Leave a comment

I’ll be changing the focus of this blog and will start poking fun at F1 rather than “analyzing” it. I’m just a regular watcher like many others, so I’ll leave the analyzing to the journalists and such.

Soon I’ll change things around and make this blog a little different.

I’ll finish with a video I made once on YouTube that is just replays Kimi Raikkonen’s incident with a falling child in slow motion. A lot of folks on YouTube point the finger at Kimi and blame him for all of this, which I cannot understand. I figured that if put in slow motion, they might actually you know, use common sense and think otherwise.

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